By Al Batt, Tribune columnist

&uot;Measles make you bumpy and mumps’ll make you lumpy and chicken pox’ll make you jump and twitch. A common cold’ll fool ya and whooping cough’ll cool ya, but poison ivy, Lord’ll make you itch!!&uot;

It had become a tradition.

Each year, the man would pluck a poison ivy plant and preach to us that poison ivy didn’t bother him a bit because his mind was too strong.

This went on for 10 years or more. He wasn’t a bad man.

He was one of those individuals who attacks the world with a certainty that approaches the arrogance of a talk radio host.

I thought he had crossed poison ivy with a four-leafed clover and was having a rash of good luck.

Among Native American tribes, there were shamans who had such strong medicine that they were capable of handling poison ivy without bad results.

Few medicine men had such powers.

Poison ivy is a common plant in our neck of the woods and no plant inspires more terror. It grows well just about anywhere &045;in the sun, in the shade, in dry soil and in moist soil. I see it most often along paths or at the edge of thickets and woodlands.

We do have poison sumac in Minnesota, but it grows deep within tamarack bogs.

Unless you spend time wading through these bogs, you are unlikely to come into contact with it. We do not have poison oak in the Midwest.

Poison ivy is a master of disguise. It far surpasses the ability of Inspector Clousseau of the Pink Panther movies.

Poison ivy has a woody stalk with droopy, three-part leaves. It resembles ivy only to those with good imaginations.

Poison ivy is a plant that grows as a shrub or a vine. It has leaves that are usually glossy, but can be dull. They can be dark or pale green in color. The edge of each leaf can be smooth or toothed.

It has yellow to green flowers that produce green to white berries after the plant is three years old. It is one of the first plants to turn a beautiful red each fall.

Often a beautiful plant called Virginia creeper is mistaken for being poison ivy.

Other names for the Virginia creeper are &uot;ghost grapes&uot; or &uot;five-fingered ivy.&uot;

Virginia creeper has five leaflets, poison ivy has only three. A good way to identify poison ivy is to remember the old saying, “leaves of three, let it be.”

I have watched pheasants and flickers eat poison ivy berries. Bears eat the berries and tumble amongst the leaves without any troubles. We aren’t as lucky as we can contract poison ivy from family pets that have come into contact with the plant.

The only way to get the itchy rash is to come in contact with the urushiol oil found in every part of the plant except the flowers. It is this oil that causes the allergic reaction.

Urushiol has the consistency and color of 3-in-1 oil.

Only when the fragile plant is damaged in some fashion does the oil leak out. Urushiol will attach to smoke particles and can cause very serious rashes to anyone downwind.

My mother got some nasty reactions several times when we burned the road ditches.

I have heard reports of urushiol still being wicked after a year of waiting on lawnmowers, garden tools and clothing.

The best treatment if you are exposed is to wash the effected area with water and apply rubbing alcohol.

Most home remedies do not work, although I have been told that the juice of the jewelweed (touch-me-not) does help.

Serious cases should involve a doctor.

I have had colds and have learned that if I treat the cold, it usually lasts seven days, but if I leave the cold untreated it will last only a week.

If you double the time to about two weeks, the same formula applies to a poison ivy rash.

It is estimated that approximately 10 percent of the population is immune to the ill effects of urushiol.

We didn’t try to talk the man out of toying with poison ivy.

My father said it wisely, &uot;Why drown if you’re meant to hang?&uot;

One year, the man pulled a plant that did bother him. He came down with a world class rash.

He took off like he didn’t know if he was on foot or horseback.

He taught us all a very important lesson.

Don’t temp the fates, especially if one of them is poison ivy.

(Hartland resident Al Batt writes a column for the Tribune each Wednesday and Sunday.)