On Friday evening after I got home from work last week, my daughter Sophie requested we go to the park.

After a long week at work, and with weather in the upper 40s, I put Sophie and Landon into their jackets and we climbed into the car and drove to Halverson Elementary School. I thought if they could get a little energy out, it would be better for all of us.

Halverson’s playground equipment has become some of Sophie’s favorite in town. While there’s a lot of climbing equipment and things for older children, there’s lots of things Landon can do, too. Plus, we’re trying to expose Landon to new environments and opportunities to help him expand his physical capabilities.

After spending some time playing, Sophie out of nowhere remarked that one of her friends at school had said something not-so-nice about me.

I stood there in awe as she told me what this little girl had said, and I was shocked that already at that age children are comparing people and saying mean things to others that they have only seen once or twice.

Those words were like a slap in the face, digging up deep emotions about a problem that I already know exists and that I am trying to address.

I asked myself all night how I could let a little 7-year-old girl’s comments have such an impact on me. Even now as I write this, the wound is still fresh.

I miss the age where children are innocent and accept everyone no matter how they look — no matter their skin color, size, disability or any other physical characteristic that may be different than others.

I don’t blame this little girl for saying what she did to my daughter. She probably learned it was OK to talk the way she did from someone else at school or maybe even an adult.

Throughout my life I have always heard, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”

The quote came from the rabbit Thumper in the animated Disney classic “Bambi.” Thumper had asked the mama deer in the movie what she was going to name her son. After hearing she was going to call him Bambi and seeing how wobbly he was on his feet, Thumper commented that Bambi couldn’t walk very well.

His mother quickly scolded him and told him to remember what his father had said earlier that morning.

We should follow the same adage in our lives.

Every day, and sometimes multiple times a day, we face instances where it may be easy to say something hurtful to someone else. It might be difficult to bite your tongue and choose not to speak the thought.

I’m sure we have all had an experience where someone at some point in our lives has said something hurtful to us. Remember that experience the next time you’re ready to open your mouth.

Be careful with your words. They can hurt more than you know.

 

Sarah Stultz is the managing editor of the Tribune. Her column appears each Tuesday.