The Nice Advice by Leah Albert

Dear Leah,

I have a darling little boy. He is 3 years old, and his favorite things in the world are his pet rabbit and his baby doll Lisa. He’s a sensitive little boy. He hugs his friends at day care, boys and girls. He’s a good friend. He cooks in the play kitchen. He cries when he sees a bug or animal in trouble. 

My husband often tells my son he needs to “toughen up” — that dolls and cooking are for girls. Men don’t do that kind of thing. We disagree about how to best parent him. My husband says I’ve turned our son into a sissy boy. I say he should be able to express his emotions and not be forced to repress them. What’s your take on this?

Signed, Modern Momma

 

Dear Momma,

I think the ways of G.I. Joe’s, guns and “manly” roles are a thing of the past, as they should be. Gender equality is an issue in our society that’s getting a lot of attention these days. Parents around the nation are speaking up and it’s making a real difference. Look at Target stores and how they are marketing their toys and other children’s items.

As it pertains to your little one, I say let him play with his baby doll. Let him cook. What’s the worst that can happen? He learns to be a nurturing father? He learns to provide for his family? More little boys should have the experience your son does. It’s innocent and genuine. Why on Earth would anyone deprive a child of that freedom?

Yes, to some extent we all need to be “tough,” but that comes with age, experience and ultimately, wisdom. Your son is cultivating the most basic human skills. Let him figure things out in safe place, with safe people he loves and trusts.

Encourage him to be a good friend to people, bugs and animals. Maybe he will grow up to be a veterinarian. Who knows? One thing’s for sure, he will grow up to be his authentic, awesome self.

Take care.

 

Leah Albert is a fictitious character. She likes wine and writing. Don’t ask her to be a matchmaker. Do send your questions to Leah at theniceadviceleahalbert@gmail.com.