Dear Minnesota,

Don’t beat yourself up if you come across a recent story in the Kiplinger personal finance website, because — spoiler alert — you were ranked the 15th worst state for people to retire to.

We know, we know. How can you have all these lakes and still rank so low? Well, the folks at Kiplinger have a point about your finances. They cited above-average living expenses, below-average incomes, taxable Social Security benefits and taxable military, government, and private pensions. Oh yeah, and higher-than-average sales and income taxes.

You have your bright spots, too, though, Minnesota. The article says you’re good for health-focused retirees; it cites the Milken Institute, which ranked you the third-healthiest state in the union for seniors. We’re pleased to note that Rochester, with its myriad medical facilities, helped nudge that ranking.

Minnesota, you have a lot to be proud of, but there are plenty of other reasons why you may not be the very best place for aging bodies to come to rest. Here are some from a local’s perspective:

Winter: Must we elaborate? Brutal temps, frigid winds, icy roads. Shoveling, salting, falling, shivering and cursing because the plow blocked your driveway.

Mosquitoes: Your 10,000 lakes are a reason to endure winter, true. They also happen to be spawning territory for countless buzzing vampires that awaken each summer to inflict bouts of itching, scratching, bleeding and slapping.

Too-long goodbyes: These are your twilight years — why waste them on overly long Minnesota goodbyes? You should spend your time learning new things, applying mastered skills, and passing on love to the next generation, not making promises to meet again that you may not be able to keep.

Minnesota niceness: By the time you reach retirement age, you know fakeness when you see it. Why sugarcoat your words? Let them out and let disagreements resolve fully, rather than fester in whispered form for years.

Money: Kiplinger has a point. Why would anyone move to a state that taxes Social Security benefits? (Minnesota is one of 13 states that do, including North Dakota and Montana.) Wasn’t that money already taken out of a paycheck from your distant past? Sometimes, enough really is enough.

That said — family, friends and the familiarity of home win out over the fine points of pensions, taxes and weather for many of us, so Minnesota, please focus on how to make the state more attractive for people to enjoy a glorious retirement here.

— Rochester Post Bulletin, April 24