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Every Little Thing by April Jeppson

 

I’m so tired. My entire body aches. As I’m typing this, I’m finding it hard to keep my arms from shaking. I’m sure if I closed my eyes for a bit I’d easily fall fast asleep. Even when I sat down I had to hold the back of the chair for support. My legs are like Jello. No, I don’t have the Rona, and I don’t need a nap. This is the result of finishing my second week of personal training.

Lockdown took its toll on me. At first I was utilizing the time to get things done around the house. Then I realized that even though the gyms were closed, I could still focus on my food intake. So I began journaling and really doing a good job of meal prep and staying within my goal ranges. That maybe lasted three weeks. Then slowly the intense need to shop local came over me. There were such amazing deals at local restaurants for takeout that I could feed my family of five for under $30. I took it upon myself to single handedly keep every diner in town open.

The weeks turned into months. I know many people who continued to exercise at home during all of this. They bought expensive bikes, they joined online fitness groups, they even built weight rooms in their basements and garages. I tried working out at home. I’ve actually tried many times over the years to get my sweat on from my living room. I’m good for about the first week. Then I realize that I can totally sit on the couch and let the video keep going and that’s about the time I stop.

Two months ago, the gyms finally opened back up. I was so excited. I had all these things planned in my mind about how I was going to hit it hard and never look back. Honestly, it was odd. It was weirdly hard getting back into the swing of things. It wasn’t just rebuilding the habit of working out, it was getting used to going places. It probably took a good month before it started to feel normal again.

So flash forward to tonight. I’m in the middle of a set, and my legs are shaking. I don’t know if I’ve ever sweated this much in my life. The realization that we are only halfway through our workout gets me wondering if I’m going to be able to walk out the door or if I’ll need to crawl. I’ve had a mentally hard week, and for 60 minutes my mind wasn’t weighed down with everything I’m going through. For one hour, my only concern was not falling over during my Bulgarian split squats.

Of course I’m bummed that for almost six months I didn’t keep up with my workouts. Yeah, not my proudest moment. However, I’m not going to beat myself up over it either. You either win or you learn. And if I’ve learned anything over the past year, it’s to enjoy the journey. I could gain 20 pounds by Christmas and wish I had the body I have right now. You never know.

At the end of the day, I’m on the right track. I’m doing something that makes my life a little better for my physical and (as I learned tonight), my mental health. I do want to formally apologize to all the local restaurants for not frequenting them as much as I used to. I do miss our time together, but I think it’s time for someone else to gain 10 pounds in support of Eat.Drink.Shop.AlbertLea.

Albert Lean April Jeppson is a wife, mom, coach and encourager of dreams.