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Every Little Thing by April Jeppson

Here comes the sun… na na na na… Here comes the sun….

I am so happy that we have made it to June; I just want to hum and sing as I do my normal day-to-day things. The sun is shining, there is no snow on the ground and it’s just magnificent. I find my love of summer a tad hard to contain. I want to throw away all my socks and wear sandals every day. No more full-length jeans, I need my ankles to feel the warmth of the sun. On a perfect day (like today), I’d wear sandals, a skirt and a comfortable T-shirt. Well if I am going to be honest, on a perfect day I’d be wearing a swimsuit and on the beach, but I’m talking a perfect Minnesota day, so I digress.

I’m naturally a pretty upbeat and positive individual. I like to look for the good in all situations. I try to keep an open mindset and look for possibilities instead of setbacks. On my worst days, with tears in my eyes and my voice trembling, I still try not to get sad or angry for too long. It’s hard for me to stay mentally down — it makes me feel ungrateful for all the awesome stuff in my life that I still have.

I didn’t get the job? I’m bummed, but it obviously wasn’t the job for me. They don’t like me? Well not everyone likes chocolate ice cream either. I dropped the ball and I feel like a failure? Well if I am going to do hard things and learn, then I’m also going to end up making mistakes along the way. No matter how upset I am, I can always find a blessing in it if you give me enough time.

It is the default state of my brain. So when someone wrongs me, it does not take me long to come up with a positive aspect for it. It helps me extend grace and forgive quickly. I feel physically drained if I am sad or angry for too long. I have learned a few tricks over the years to help me get through these rough patches quickly. The problem with moving on because I forgave fast is that sometimes people take advantage of you. Moreover, if you are like me, you forgive and move on so much that it takes a while to realize that your kindness is being abused.

That is a hard line in the sand to draw. To determine at what point you stop giving people second chances. At what point do I say, yeah I understand you did not mean to, but you did. Some situations are easier to figure out than others are. I find that I make myself less available to those whose intentions are not good for me. I keep my circle tight and sometimes I just need to tighten it up a bit more. No biggie, lesson learned.

I say no biggie, but there are usually many private tears and a lot of positive self-talk involved getting me to that Zen place. I am proud of how much I’ve grown over the years, though. Smaller things that I use to fret over are now easy for me to move past. That is a big win for me. It also shows me that through these difficult times, I am learning and growing and becoming better at this. And when you become better at something, it feels easier.

It’s summertime and the living is easy.

Albert Lean April Jeppson is a wife, mom, coach and encourager of dreams. Her column appears every Saturday.