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Live United by Erin Haag

One early spring morning, my husband drove me out to a farm in rural Kansas. A working farm had advertised that they had purebred Australian Sheperds for sale. When we got to the farm, there was a whole group of 3-month-old black and tan puppies just ecstatic with the idea of meeting new people. Alongside them was a smaller puppy, brown with a white nose.

The black and tan rowdy ones were adorable, but I had determined we needed a girl because I had been told they were easier to train, and these were all boys. There was one little girl left, the brown and white one. Next to her splashy brothers with their bold coloring and rough and tumble play, she wasn’t as noticeable. She came over, sat right in front of me and looked up as I leaned down to say hello.

Being determined to be logical, I had intentionally gone to the farm not planning to come home with a dog. No puppy breath was going to sway me from this. I had a specific need for this dog and I needed to make sure I chose well. I know what you’re all thinking — that I didn’t make it. Truth is, I did! We drove away, and talked about if this was the right choice. A few miles down the road, my husband stopped in the middle of the gravel road, looked at me and said, “We’re going back. She picked you.” I told him, “No, we don’t even have a crate or anything yet!” “We’ll stop at Tractor Supply on the way home, but she’s coming home with us.”

That sweet brown puppy named Ginger grew into the best dog ever. She was well trained, shopping at Bed Bath and Beyond, attending the Farmers Market and generally getting all kinds of socialization. She went everywhere with us, attended classes and learned how to stay within 6 feet of us. She herded my niece and nephew around and monitored the morning bus stop on our corner. As a new wife and mother with a husband that traveled or worked nights often, she made me feel safe alone in the house. She helped me rock babies to sleep, posed for first day of school pictures each year, and she trots down to the end of the driveway to put them on the bus.

Ginger’s been on my mind quite a bit lately as I watch her slow down more and more. Her golden eyebrows have now turned white, and instead of putting the kids on the bus like she used to, she now watches over them from the porch. She often needs to be carried up the stairs to get into the house. She’s well loved though, and she loves us in return.

At the pantry on Thursday night, I had the opportunity to talk with some of our shoppers and volunteers. I noticed we talked about the same things — children and pets. One Great Dane named Dax waited outside and helped a little girl drink some water, leading another shopper to tell stories about her grandkids. A senior was having trouble swiping through the pictures on her smartphone. A Spanish-speaking man smiled and reached out to help her. His wife leaned forward to admire the pictures of her pets.

Children and dogs love with their whole heart, and they’re loved back by many. A child cries in our waiting room, and there are looks of sympathy, words of encouragement to the parent, and general understanding. A dog is outside and brings joy to those who stop to say help, giving a pet on the way out. One woman looked at me and said, “that dog just made my whole day!”

I told a volunteer that everyone should love each other like children and dogs. We should find as much joy in the people sitting beside us as we do the puppy waiting outside on a leash.

Wouldn’t it be a wonderful thing if when we saw someone acting outside of the “norm” we automatically assumed, “oh that person has had a rough day, let me offer support”.

A regular volunteer asked me if I had family in town. I explained that our family is spread out, the closest being four hours away. She told me that if I ever needed help running kids anywhere, to let her know. They’d love to help. I’ve spent enough time with these retired educators that absolutely I would trust my children with them. She didn’t’ leave it there. She reminded me a week later that they’d love to have the kids for a while if we could use the help. That’s the kind of love our community needs. All that love for children and animals, bonding over silly cat pictures and reminiscing of days gone by when watching a young mother try to grocery shop with a child that is just done for the day — .let’s make sure we’re sending that to the adults as well, even when we don’t immediately recognize a shared love of animals and kids.

Kids and dogs are our best example of living United. It’s the essence of who they are. I love cats, too, but they’re a little persnickety that way, especially mine so I’m going to stick with dogs here.

When you love them well, they love well in return. Our neighbors in need haven’t always been loved well, so they don’t always know how to love well back. I use the term love often — when others might soften the language, using societal norms. “Treat others as you’d like to be treated.” I prefer the stronger language of love. A friend of mine once announced that she was going to tell me she loved me on a regular basis. She said, “I’m not trying to make it weird, but I love you. I’m not going to be afraid to tell you that.” She’s known for her special brand of joy and enthusiasm and positivity, so of course she’s not afraid to love out loud.

Love out loud. Love adults that don’t know how to love you back, and love children and dogs. Embrace their needs, and you’ll be rewarded. There are lots of adults out there like that persnickety cat of mine, but I know she secretly loves us. Lead by example, loving the best way you can, with the loyalty of a dog, the open heart of a child and the compassion of an adult who’s seen enough of the world to be able to imagine what others have gone through. Need ideas on how to love others? Give us a call at 507-373-8670 to find ways.

Erin Haag is the executive director of the United Way of Freeborn County.